Living Is A Curse

In order for you to be looking for something, something must be, first, missing.

This singular sentence captures within it more meaning than the mind can hope to comprehend.

A child that misplaces their favourite toy wails and cries at their inability to find it.

What do adult humans do if not spend their lives suffering and weeping as they search for something?

But, searching for what, exactly?

All aspects of life are, fundamentally, born from a seed of struggle and suffering. This is to directly oppose the view that life is inherently some sort of ‘blessing’ or ‘gift.’

Is life really so beautiful?

One may view a bird embellished in the most beautifully-coloured feathers, but what is the life of a bird really?

A bird is born frail and weak. Unable to sustain its own livelihood, it spends the early part of its life reliant on its parents to feed them. Then, with time, our young chick grows: Its bones lengthen, muscles strengthen, and it develops the capability of flight.

Time has come for it to leave the mother’s nest.

During flight, a hummingbird’s heart will run as high as 1,200 beats per minute. Even with vigorous exercise, most humans struggle to hit 200. If the average man’s metabolism was as high as the average hummingbird, they would need 120,000 daily calories just to sustain themselves.

The hummingbird’s flight may look elegant; its feathers may look pretty. But is their life such a beautiful thing?

This bird was forced into this world without any choice. And as it physically matured, it came time for it to take care of itself. It came time for it to take on life.

Frantically sweeping the skies from point A to B.

B to C.

C to D.

Always on the hunt for something. Hours upon hours of the day are spent toiling.

Digging their beaks into the hard ground to find food. Carefully weaving together sticks with mud to form their nests. The occasional fight must also be had to protect itself and its resources.

But do birds not get to rest? Of course, they do. But, what is the purpose of resting?

Is it not simply to recharge oneself so you can better handle the demands of life the following day? Indeed, it appears that even the one thing that doesn’t seem like work is also, ultimately, observed for the purpose of being able to work better once your rest time ends.

The once feeble chick that had no hope of surviving on its own eventually grows not only to provide for itself but also the family they have now begun. It takes on the responsibility of feeding those that cannot sustain their own livelihood.

And the circle of life continues.

But why think of any of this as beautiful or romantic?

Once it was forced into this world, the bird had to comply with the demands of life. If it did not, life would mercilessly punish it.

We do what we do because, if we don’t, life punishes us.

If we do not find the right types of food, and, in sufficient amounts, our stomachs will burn and churn.

If we cannot find refuge from the weather, the cold will knife us and the sun will scorch us.

We are also undeniably wired to want each other. Our biology compels us to find intimacy and reproduce. Should you be considered undesirable by potential mates, your mind will torment you.

You live life as a performer that is dancing; not by choice, but because there’s a gun being held to your head.

Is this something really worth celebrating? Is this something beautiful?

Some of us are said to be enveloped in the search for the meaning of life.

But in order for you to be looking for something, you are conceding to the fact that something is currently missing.

Would you go looking for your phone if it was in your hand and you were aware of this fact?

We only look for things that we believe are missing.

So, underneath it all, what is lost? What are we looking for?

It appears that virtually no one has found IT,

And those that have — well, they are of little use to anyone.

How many books have been written by those who have claimed to have found IT? If we could simply listen to these authors and replicate them to find IT as well, wouldn’t we have all stopped searching by now? Wouldn’t at least swathes of us have been successful?

It is interesting when you hear people talk about the meaning of life,

finding purpose,

or attaining peace.

In all such things, some sort of search is involved. But what became lost such that we are now looking for it? Is it the bliss and peace we vaguely recall from childhood?

Perhaps we have just confused ourselves.

Perhaps we have erred in trying to find meaning or something to bring us peace.

Were we born and given some meaning to life that we subsequently forgot about?

No.

A human is born unable to speak, understand, or write words. Was this human given some secret understanding or meaning to their life that they later forgot about as an adult?

It doesn’t seem that way.

Why, then, when this human becomes an adult do they search for some meaning or purpose? Why do they go looking for something that isn’t lost because it never existed in the first place?

The truth is, there is nothing to find.

Yet, we look, because all of this is simply too much.

Every day, you are bombarded by a million different things you need to care about. A million different things force you to pay attention to them.

Your health. Your relationships. Your standing in society. The things you need to do tomorrow and how you are going to do them. The things you did yesterday and why you regret them.

And you do all of this just to do it again the next day. And, then, eventually, drop dead.

You are looking for something because life is a burden and a curse. And you need something to make it all okay.

But have you ever found IT? And, if you have, how long did it last?

Maybe IT is realising that there is nothing to be found. Maybe IT is realising that IT doesn’t exist.