How Every Child Is Poisoned

The Battle of Cannae, fought in 216 BC, is cited as one of the most brutal battles of all time. Its combatants used spears, swords, and brute force. It was gore. Many died simply from having their heads trampled on.

Imagine if a child dropped into the centre of such a scene. What’s the chance they’ll survive?

Around 400,000 babies are born each day. Though almost none are born into physical war, they are born into their own Battle of Cannae. Such is the internal turmoil of the people they live amongst. From the moment they awake till they sleep, the child is a witness to the scurries of unsettled minds.

The frantic morning rush. The annoyance over the milk that was spilt at the table. The crossed face that cleans the mess. The eyes, buried in a black rectangle, absorbing pointless content and thoughts; the food that spills on ironed clothes because the eyes were distracted. The sprint to the door when you realise the time.

And, after the workday finishes, the family reunites.

The arguments over why the house is messy. The indecision over dinner; the disappointment once it’s made. The TV show to fill the time. The regret when you see the time. The worry you won’t get enough sleep.

Tomorrow, some details may differ. But your life assumes an unchanging form. The same feelings come; the same feelings go.

The problem is not simply the monotony of everyday life. The problem is not the ‘rat race.’ The problem is not lacking the wealth to follow whatever routine you want. Because, any routine — and even the absence of one — will leave you feeling the same way.

Unfulfilled.

In truth, the problem lies in living as though any of it matters. As though the routine matters. As though the milk spilt at breakfast matters.

Society is a chain of blind leading blind: Leading each other into the endless cycle of chases and the inextricable anxiety and emptiness it brings. The child is reared watching these minds and their battles take place.

And in viewing these events, every day of his life, the child too is blinded.

Given basic sustenance, a child can live in bliss. But this bliss is short-lived. This is not because bliss is locked only for the early years of a human’s life. Parents, society, culture: They robbed it from you. Stick in one hand, carrot in the other. Teaching about good and bad. Worthy and unworthy. Acceptable and unacceptable.

What things actually ‘matter’ to a child?

The truth about parenting is difficult to stomach: Parents have almost nothing to teach a child that isn’t poisonous.

But, isn’t this idea irresponsible? How will the child know about good jobs and bad jobs? About making money? About who to associate with and who to avoid?

Breathe. Look at the world you live in. Have its inhabitants not been taught about life? About how to live it? Weren’t you?

And, tell me, where is everyone? Where are they headed? Where are you?

Who has peace?

I must sigh. For you will not look at the world and ask these questions sincerely. How could you? Were you not also blinded?

The entirety of a man’s life is a lie. The lie he tells himself about a parent’s role is amongst the most elaborate. Must he strive to give his child a wonderful education? An expensive home? A companion for life?

In reality, man knows not the first thing to do with his child, for he knows not the first thing to do with himself.

Tell me: How can anything embroiled in turmoil bring peace to another? How can the problem be the solution? How can the disease be the cure?

Often, it is remarked that the role of a parent is to prepare their child for the world as best they can.

But what is this world? Suffering.

What are the “preparations?” An endless, ineffective series of chases to numb the suffering.

The parents are suffering. The world they live in suffers. Every child is ruined because the ones that raise him are, themselves, ruined.

It is not fruit from the poisonous tree. It is fruit that was poisoned after leaving the tree.